invisible

To be invisible is all in one’s head. It’s a state of mind. In my opinion, one who feels invisible doesn’t necessarily have self esteem problems. I have felt like this before but it was mainly because of the decrease in attention that I was receiving. Being the youngest child, I was always looked at as “the baby” until the day that I would dread for months happened and it was nothing that I could do to prevent it. My little cousin came from Minnesota to live with us because she was basically born into a bad situation and it would have been more beneficial for her to come live with us. The first week was the worst, everyone crowded around her as if she was a new born and I was as jealous as can be. The places that my mom used to take me, she was taking her, the morning breakfast that was usually cooked for me was being cooked for her, the time spent with my mom was being split with her, and the thing that hurt me the most was the money that my mom would spend on me was being split up between the two of us. (yes its petty, but that’s how I felt.) I didn’t want to share my life with her. The following week was also bad. It was bad because I thought I would get used to it but I couldn’t. I couldn’t get used to being ignored, I couldn’t get used to being INVISIBLE…